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Archive for January, 2009

My aunt-the midwife

She has been a midwife for many years.  She has 7 children. She asked me some physical therapy questions and said if I ever had fertility questions to just ask.  So I did, and she gave me some great advice on herbs and treatments for male fertility.  I thought it was funny because as we were emailing back and forth about all things fertility she told me that she understood my frustration because it took her over 2 years to get pg with #1 and that she had to work REALLY hard for #5 too.  hahahaha All this time I thought 7 was just a fluke but nope, apparently they REALLY wanted a lot of kids. 

Being a midwife she has delivered all 6 of her grandchildren at home.  The most recent little boy was born at home on Jan. 17.  Apparently he had a short umbilical cord and during the delivery, the cord tore from the placenta and he lost a lot of blood.  She had to rescucitate the baby while they called 911.  The baby was taken to NICU but is fine and is home now.  Apparently she had realized sometime during the labor that the cord was short and there would be a problem.  They had considered stopping the labor and going to a hospital, but since the mother was progressing, they decided to go ahead anyway.  I am so thankful that everything is okay.  How scary that must have been. 

Eric is now completely against midwives.  He thinks having a baby at home is the dumbest idea ever! I personally would prefer to be a hospital, but I don’t think a midwife is a bad idea.  My BFF is pregnant with #2.  She will be doing a home delivery with a midwife this time around.  Her first was c-section, so this will be  a VBAC and she is so excited about it!

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Blessings

We are still actively TTC, of course.  It kind of makes me sad how hopeless I feel about it though.  I honestly don’t know if I am being pessimistic about the thought of achieving a pregnancy or just realistic.  I am charting and doing the OPK thing, but I really don’t have any hope that it’s going to work anytime soon.  Eric is taking tons of zinc and vitamin Cto help with count.  And we are going this weekend to buy some other herbs for him.  Since our insurance doesn’t cover treatment for IF and we are still waiting for our bill from the RE’s office, we are holding off on the urologist and the repeat SA for now.  Since he would see a urologist regarding male infertility, we would have to pay out of pocket for the appt., testing, etc.  He is actually extremely optomistic at this point that his count will increase and we will conceive.  I am optimistic that the count will improve, but I think it will take awhile. 

I guess in a strange way, I have peace of mind knowing that it probably won’t happen immediately.  I am a lot less stressed over my chart and counting the stupid days of my LP.  I guess that is the blessing.  I am extremely happy that we are a lot closer now than a year ago.  Sometimes you get blessings in disguise and I’m really trying to think in terms of that.  This entire IF journey is all a blessing in disguise.  I just wish it would take the mask off already!

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I have been tagged by my friend Dave.  Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.  At the end choose 5 people to be tagged.  You have to tag the person who tagged you.

1. I am confident and insecure all at the same time.

2. I am longing to be a mother.

3. I am scared to death that I never will.

4. My husband is my best friend.

5. My sister is a close second place.

6. My nephew, Hunter, lights up my world.

7.  I adore my dog, Summer.

8.  I wish I had more time to play with her.

9. I love to read.

10. But don’t make enough time to.

11. I love being home.

12. I could eat sushi every day.

13. I can’t live without the internet.

14. I really enjoy a cup of coffee every morning.

15. I hate shopping.

16. I have the greatest job in the world-physical therapist.

17. I love helping people.

18. I fear that people don’t realize how much I care.

19. I have greatly backed away from the TV in the past year, and I love it.

20. I wish I was better organized.

21. I didn’t realize this list would take so long to complete.

22. Getting an iced latte, a pedicure and reading a trashy magazine is my guilty pleasure.

23. I wish I liked running.

24. I love playing basketball.

25. I would love to write a book one day.

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The 80’s party

Last night we went to our friend Ernie’s 40th birhday party-80’s style.  It was so much fun! Now I am hungover miserably!

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What’s new?

Well not a lot on my end.  I am waiting to O.  It sucks because we are trying to time everything correctly so the sex is 3 days apart, for the best count.  Today is CD15 and still a negative OPK.  Ugh! I don’t want to wait til tomorrow, because then it will be 4 days of abstinence and I think the poor little guys will be too old.  Hopefully the O will on CD 17 then it will only be 2 day abstinence.  The crazy thing is, my temps are still down, but I have crazy amounts of EWCM (tmi I know) and still a negative OPK.  I’m kind of afraid my temp will go up before I get a positive.  Seriously, the IF lifestyle sucks!  I hate worrying about these things!  Update to follow!

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My little nephew, Hunter.  He is just so freaking cute and a great baby! Infertility sucks!

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Jumping back on the wagon!

After giving up last cycle, I am now actively TTC again-for the 25th cycle.  I am back to charting, checking CM, and OPK’s.  I haven’t used OPK’s in about a year, but I’m giving it a try again.  Our chances are slim-yes, but we are hoping that as Eric drops LBs our chances will go up, and a tiny miracle will happen.  We are planning on repeating the SA in a few months (paying out of pocket) and will make solid definite decisions at that point. 

In the meantime, we had a kick-ass New Year’s party at our house and here are a few pics.  I am praying for a BFP before 2010! Come on miracles!

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